progressive humor, Israel humor

The Simon Weisenthal Center unveils new Missile of Tolerance

The Simon Weisenthal Center, a leading Jewish human rights organization, proudly announced their new Missile of Tolerance today. The Weisenthal 1, is an air-to-surface missile that will be used to teach Palestinian militants and any Palestinian civilians in the two hundred-yard radius a strong message of racial tolerance. The 750-pound blast fragmentation warhead is specially designed to improve tolerance in anyone killed, injured or burned beyond recognition by the powerful explosive.

The missile performed well in an early morning Tolerance Education Mission on a suspected Palestinian militant, five of his neighbors and a six-year-old boy that happened to be playing in a burned out car by the compound. The attack resulted in seven more racially enlightened Palestinians who will be buried in a large funeral procession later in the week.

In addition, the Weisenthal Center also released the New Lexicon of Hate. A pocket guide to help and to better equip families, clergy, law enforcement, the military, and the media to recognize today's symbols and symptoms of bigotry which have infected many Arabs and Palestinians. The lexicon documents the coded anti-Semitic hate speech that is common among Palestinians. Included in the book are coded phrases commonly used by Palestinians: “Please stop torturing me, I have no idea where he is”, “Can I have some clean water?” or “Didn’t the United Nations decide these settlements are illegal?” These are all revealed for their insidious anti-Semitic nature.

progressive humor, Israel humor